A Little Late

I know I am a little late on this post but just not had the time to sit down and write it. This 4th of July was probably the most patriotic 4th I have spent in many years and it was really special. It was special because I really got the meaning of what the holiday was all about. It may have taken me 55 some odd years but it was more than just fireworks for me this year.

I went to a concert in the park where they played patriotic music and then had a fireworks show with music and it really did move me. One section they honored all the service men and women by playing each of the songs for each of the branches of the armed services and the people stood up who were in these branches..it was really moving. Then we sang America the Beautiful and Glod Bless America, and more than ever it gave me goose bumps. The whole thing was just real special and I am so grateful to be an American Citizen!

Happy Anniversary

Today is my 9th Year Wedding Anniversary! You may all laugh at this but this 9 years is a record for me, so we must be doing something right! I met my husband actually back in high school and then 30 years later met up again online and before you knew it we were married! A quick courtship. Its had its ups and downs and laughter and lots of tears but through it all we have stuck it out and I am grateful for that. I love you Jim.

Missing Family

Never did realize how difficult it would be to be away from my girls! I surely do miss them ... seeing them every week ... it's not the same 1400 miles away and talking on the phone.

Missing my mom and dad and brothers and sisters also. My dad emailed me today to thank me for his Texas Pecan Pie and I just started to cry.

Don't ever take family for granted ... far or close always love them and cherish them.

Success

It is sometimes strange to me when I am feeling something and then something I read or hear is so related. Today I read the assigned posts from creativity Boot Camp Spring Training and it so applied to my last post ... here is what she wrote:

"...a huge lesson for me was that if I was going to be successful, I had to be successful as myself. I couldn't be successful doing what other people were doing. I had to do what I believed in and what felt real to me and what felt true to me, "because the worst thing to be is successful as someone else." - Shawn Carter

"..I knew that I had to let go of other people's perception of my work. I couldn't base my success on what others thought is successful. I have to define success for myself.

Struggling

Seems lately I have been struggling with what to do in life. I am almost 56 and still dont know what I should be doing and what my real passion is? Do any of you out there have that same problem. I love to create and I see all these awesome some sites of women creating and love their work, but what is unique to me is what I am struggling with??? I can take someones else idea and make it my own by changing it up but whey cant I ever think of my own ideas. It is so frustrating. How do I dig deep into my soul and find out whats there. I struggle with this day in and day out.

Now trying some sewing crafts to see if that is where my passions lie. I like putting things together; don't like drawing but can put together stuff real well, I am creative like that so hopefully I will create something I fall in love with with sewing or with fabrics...who knows.

Morning Pages

Have or are any of you practicing writing "morning pages?" I am doing the Spring training Workshop and one of the suggestions was doing morning pages which is an idea gotten from the Artists Way. It is writing three pages of just cursive writing in the morning to clear your mind. They say that after doing this for several weeks, it clears your mind and your creativity and intuition is so much clearer. New ideas and things come to mind and solutions to problems. And on and on.So I am going to do it, in fact I started today and write my three pages. You are to do it every morning before your day starts and just write and write,no editing, no reading just writing. Lets see if it works!!

Hope all have a happy memorial day weekend!

All Alone

I am officially an "empty nester". Both my daughters are now moved back to sunny California and i am here three states away in Texas. I never imageined my family would be separated by three states let alone three cities, but here I find myself in this situation. It is sad for me. I cannot just run down the street and visit them, now I have to make plans and take time to go and visit them...not sure I am liking that. But I promised my husband at least two years in Texas, soI have to stick to that. It is not that I dont like Texas, I do like Texas, I like my home, living near my cousins, but I too, also miss Simi Valley. Not so much California but Simi Valley where I lived for thirty some odd years. where my kids grew up, got married, graduated and where my son died. How do I leave that history behind. I am not the kind of person that can do that. There is no history here for me in Texas. Sure I have maybe 40 some years to make it, but do I really want to make it when my entire family lives in California?

It is hard to be away ... in the meantime I will take some writing classes, some art classes , go visit places in Texas i have never seen, and make the best of it.