Today Is The First Day ...

We have all heard the saying ... "today is the first day of the rest of your life" ... right?  Today that saying is all mine. Today I start a healthy lifestyle, one that I have always wanted to do but have never done. I have always envied, and I know envy is not a good thing, all those women who have the commitment and what it takes to live healthy and practice healthy eating and physical activity. And then there are those of us - who think about it all the time, and yet never get our assess of the couch and do anything to change our life's. I read blog after blog, women just up and do it, and make it all sound so easy - well let me tell you, it is not that easy. It is probably one of the hardest things to do for yourself.

I, have never put myself first. In fact I will put a stranger first before I do anything for myself - why, I am not totally sure. But I have also heard, one does not need to know the whys of everything. And that is what has been striking me lately, that I want to see others happy, yet not myself. And that got me to thinking about me - finally. In two weeks I will be 59 years old - and although that is  really not that old, in some places I am considered a senior citizen, which is another topic for another day! And at 59 years old,  I can honestly say I have never put myself first and have never been happy. Oh sure I have been happy and there have been so many good times in my life, but that's not what I am talking about here. I am talking about inner happiness and contentment. That is what has eluded me my entire life. I have no idea what that even feels like - to be totally happy with me, as a human being, as a woman. And that is what I am starting today - that journey and search for inner happiness. Sounds silly to some, but I want to love myself as much as I love my son, two daughters and husband.

I will be blogging this journey every day. Some days may seem quite boring to most, but I think if I write about it - it becomes more real. I become accountable to myself. Wish me luck ...